Lots of people, guys and girls, recommend Plenty of Fish online dating (which I dub Plenty-Of-Flesh) because it’s free. I’ve been a member there twice now, and I haven’t been impressed either time.
The site places a lot of emphasis on photos, which has led to people judging one another not by their messages, but solely by looks. I’m not impressed with the forum moderator either, who has a firm yet obnoxious and stuck-up attitude to posts that raise questionable suggestions issues, even with the site.
Many of the people there have been rude and/or full of hot air, both in the forums and through messaging. Even the friendliest of messages went ignored - the sent messages list proved extremely helpful in finding out just where they were going.
Plenty of Fish advertises itself as a dating site, which is my biggest disappointment: the only people who’d enjoy Plenty of Fish are the average loud, outgoing people who already have “great” lives and have no intention of being serious.
As with most other places I’d suggest someone experience it for themselves, if only for them to reach their own conclusion. I’ve had much better results with Match and Perfect Match.
I had a horrible experience !!!!!!!!!!!!
Met up with a freak who takes advantage of innocent women He uses different profiles to check on you and get his next victems I can only hope he gets a taste of his own medicine before anyone else has to be subjected to his disgusting waysif you see a wink tatoo girls run very fast
Three out of four people that I’ve met through POF have been great. The other was clearly a gold-digger looking for a sugar-daddy. I think you just have to have a detailed profile and first communicate by email and phone before you meet in person.
I met some really weird liars. If you ladies see a guy with a close up picture in a sunglasses and riding gear look out he will use you and cheat.
in response to the site plentyoffish. I have been a member for quite sometime and i have met a few women on here. I have become rather disappointed with the site. It seems that all are on there now are women who have been married and divorced or have a child. Where are all the nice looking single ladies at with no children and how do you go about meeting them?
hey guys—-ever notice that the men are always the ones who accused of being weird on here—lately–met a nice[?] lady on here- pof-chatted for 2 1/2 weeks then met–
talk about false info on profile–nothing near what was listed–i excused myself with dignity but she has been stalking and e-mailing the nastiest notes possible–
Sooooooo–guys–remember–women can be as bad or worse at representing themselves–and–chat only to profiles with pics!!!!!
yes i agree there r some bad women and men on here. the guys ive talked to mostly r only after one thing. isnt there any guys that want a real relationship. , and guys that dont judge people there r some honest women on here, im one of them but cant seem to find a nice and real guy.
I met a hot… funny…smart…wonderful guy and we dated for a little bit.. that was until his GIRLFRIEND emailed me. Taken guys on a single site! Jerk.
I have met another guy since than on pof and I think this is the real thing for the first time in my life.. so it can work out both ways. wish me luck!
I don’t always like the ones I meet. But I don’t always like the ones I meet in other ways either. The biggest confusion I find is that I don’t want to just “settle” for the first person I meet, on the other hand, I feel a little like i’m cheating if i talk to more than one person. By the time I meet someone in person, they may feel like we have a relationship going and I feel like i am just learning more about a new friend. I don’t try to lead anyone on and i am completely honest about where I stand,on the other hand i try to be courtious and not talk about things i don’t think they would want to hear. That happens in person too. Why is it that if you aren’t rude people think you have some sort of agenda?
I would like to resopnd to Charles’ remark about women with children. I have children I am a beautiful black women with a dam good job, my own house and car with children. You are going to miss out on meeting a good women because you don’t want her to have kids. Good luck finding a women without kids. Its rare. I can see why you are on this site looking for a women. I have never meet anyone on this site. I prefer to meet people in passing. I loged on to this site to see what its all about. You are a fool if you let kids stand in the way of you meeting a good women. All women with kids are not bad. My kids are very well behaved. I am the type of women that don’t ask the man that i am dating to take care of my kids. That’s what their father is for. It sound like you just don’t like kids and its a good thing you don’t want to be aroung them. Open you mind and you might find the women of your dreams and she has kids!
yeah i would like to make a comment about what charles said about women with children. there are alot of women with shildren on her just like me. im not looking for a babies daddy but some one for myself. im a single mother who works hard to care for my children being single with kids doesnt make people bad. ive seen alot of guys on here with kids as well. so maybe charles needs to find another site to be on.
I have e-mailed a few ladies on here.I haven’t met anyone yet but a few have e-mailed me back.I am not EXPECTING anything all I want is to meet new people and make new friends.I hate that “MATCHES” section why are most matches in OTHER STATES?The hard part of this when your matched with a 21 year old or a 26 year old,I am 44 and I feel like a pervert when I get those match ups,or I get the ones with no picture.If people put you in their favorites or they love you sections,they have looked at you.I look in a profile I feel that I should leave at least a comment or say hi.I don’t get all upset if I get no reply.I move on,besides there are “PLENTY OF FISH” in the sea.Thanks people for reading best of luck to you all.
Hi, I would like to say that I am a divorced mother of two wonderful children. I have read these comments about single woman with kids and it just goes to show how some ppl can just be so shallow. It doesnt matter if ur male or female with kids, if the opposite sex does not want kids they are going to say whatever they feel the need to say. There are many many strong woman and men who are single with children and do just fine without the opposite sex. I think I can speak for most of us (if not then I apologize) when I say we are not looking for someone to raise our children or suport them. Please ppl stop being so shallow and try to be open minded and look around u might just find the love of ur life and they will more than likely have children.
Hey Charles;
The young pretty single women already have boyfriends.
I’ve met some really nice people on POF, and of course there have been some crumbs as well.
My peeve ladies, is the lack of a reply to a well thought-out e-mail. Ok, some of you hotties get hundreds each day and just delete them without reading. So why are you here? Even a oneliner “no thanks” is more polite than ignoring a person.
POF only provides the introduction and if you don’t talk, communicate… you’ll never find anyone here, or anywhere else. And when you think someone is interesting, still keep the caution flags waving and exercise due caution.
Good Luck Charles, your gonna need it. A Lot!
I for one, am a single dad in Florida, and I’ve been on and off of POF for going on 6 months. To all of you single moms who can’t find a guy, I’m right here. I still hang out on POF mostly for the forums, but occasionally get a new mail, usually from someone WAY too far for a real relationship. Truth be told, I got a LOT more mail, BEFORE I had a picture posted. A majority of people on POF are very shallow.
Hi all! I have been on pof 4 times now and I just have a problem with the size options. I am 5 3 and a somewhat heavy woman . I am 58 pounds overweight this is a far cry from a few pounds over weight. But anywho, I would like to see pof give more size options, because I can’t list BBW because I am not tall. This part of the profile really makes some men mad, because they think that we are lying to them in our profile, but we aren’t. But hey some guys outright lie, most on here list average size or worse yet athletic, when they are clearly over over weight.
I have met what I thought were some really nice guys on here. But the four ( yes 3 were very heavy men) I went on dates with just wanted a lady with money. Which is sad. Because there are some really great women and guys out there who are being overlooked for being underrich. AS for the weirdos, our hearts shouldn’t overrule our common sense. We all have intuition and when we talk with people on here, we need to keep a level head and pay attention to what is said. Sure it is nice to hear compliments and wonderful things. But we are all old enough to know when something doesn’t seem right. It just doesn’t happen here, it also can happen in the “OUTSIDE” world too. Psychos and weirdos are everywhere. Yall stay safe and have fun, BYE.
It’s just sad to me that we live in a world where people have to judge each other.I am not rich I sure am not Brad Pitt.I work with what I got,I am on my own have a job and I make things work.I don’t care if a woman has kids,guys who think that women with kids are a turn off really bug me.NEWS FLASH that is MOM’S pride and joy,the fact is they feel that they will be second and THAT is EGO.Get over yourselves guys,these ladies need love too.
Reading the above, I think its odd that you have to pick from a limited selection of “body type” descriptions, also. It ought to be up to you to add that in your profile. I had problems with that…I listed myself as a bbw and got my head chewed off by a guy who said I dont “qualify”. I have to be a certain weight and wear a certain size jeans. So, I changed it to a few extra pounds, but I am more than just a few extra pounds over, even though I carry it well (I have height on my side) Voluptuous doesnt cut it either…men expect huge boobs with that description, lol!
Also…I have been on lots of other sites and in my experience, men use the internet dating sites as a big old candy store. Even if they find someone perfect, they will continue to “just check” and see what else is out there, in case something better shows up. I find this very disturbing, it seems like people dont really want relationships anymore, and while women may be guilty of the same thing (I dont date women, so I dont know) it seems like most men want eye candy, even when they themselves are grossly overweight. I am always wary of guys who ask my bra size, I mean, fine, if a guy is a boob-man, good for him, but guess what? Big boobs dont make a good woman, and that lets me know they arent seriously looking for a relationship. I have yet to find a man here who is looking for his soulmate…they all want a playmate. And here is a tip for the ladies…watch out for JayinNY, the guy who says he used to be an accountant (yet cant even spell it) I met him and it was a horrible experience. Steer clear of this guy!!!!!!! Good luck to everyone.
@allpafla
it’s true what you say about the young, pretty…
and i completely agree that most people on pof are quite rude. like you say, a polite, “no thanks” at least shows you are considerate; karma.
myself, i’m not so picky. just someone with a good heart and a backpack…
And i also agree with Timbo. a lot of us guys don’t have a problem if a woman has children.
so why am i still on pof?!?!?
just my .02
This is a reply to Valerie’s “SOUL MATE” comment.I resent that.I am not here for a soul mate I am here to meet people and make new friends.Soul Mate is a word that’s thrown around so easily so are words like communication,trust,honesty,faithfulness,and commitment.Seems to me that when I read your comments it seems like it was a “WEIGHT ISSUE” more then a “SOUL MATE ISSUE”.Sure you said you were overweight BUT weren’t you being a bit hypocritical when you found these men to be “OVER WEIGHT” when you yourself are ALSO “OVERWEIGHT”?I have a news flash for you Valerie WE as a NATION are the “FATTEST” Country right now.My ex-wife was heavy and that did NOT bug me any I loved her REGARDLESS of all that.I don’t judge people on looks or anything else I accept people “AS THEY ARE”.I am not here for a “PLAY MATE” either.Seems to me you’re looking in the wrong places and by the way NOT all men are so critical.I don’t put standards on PEOPLE.If you are so bothered by weight problems only YOU can fix that but my personal opinion is why change to please someone else why not PLEASE YOU first?
This is a rebuttal to Timbo’s comment. I am sure Valerie meant no harm. It is a statement. Most men on here are looking for the Barbie doll type. They overlook overweight women. This is a fact . Truly if you think about it, all the beautiful women that are on here, ie…thin, beautiful, rich , intelligent, PAris Hilton kind of women, why are they on here? Are they really that great? Shouldn’t they be sitting in a millionaires lap or in rehab somewhere? Hell, why are any of us on the net looking for the person that is meant for us? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Some people just tend to wear blinders. She was correct when she said that the majority of men on the net sites do continue to look for something better. That is the sad part. I dated a guy from a dating site for 10 months . It was like we were made for each. The whole 10 months he was continuing to use the computer to scout out something better. He hid this fact from me, until a girlfriend of mine saw his picture on the very site that I met him and he was using the service every day. This told me that he would never settle down. At least not with me. He is still playing the field. But we cannot give up . We get discouraged, but everyone in this world has someone that is just made for them. My parents had it, and we can too. Keep our chins up and our hearts open, people. Its a big world out there.
Hey Timbo , why dont’ you ask either me or Valerie for our email address, or find us on POF? Since the weight issue doesn’ bother you?
well i’ve been on pof for the past 3 days. and i didnt put my picture up for a day and i only had 1 response. the next day i put up my picture and less than one hour i had 18 messages. doesnt say much with the guys on here. it doesnt make any sense to me. i dont have a bf but im really on here just to make friends and to pass time. i signed my bro up as well at the same time and now its been 3 days and he still has no replies..just make sure you email and talk first before you meet them.. coz i know i wont be doing that…
to valerie im lookin for a soulmate so dont say theres no one on here not lookin for a soulmate david
There seems to be alot of people not serious about wanting a mate. I have seen pictures of nice looking attractive gals who could have a date any day of the week. I think also there are some gals who just have a profile to see who will contact them.
Asking for an e-mail this early is a bit too soon,knowing I just signed up Bevior,but I like the idea.I am not the type of man that judges people based on looks,race,religion,body type.I think it’s wrong for people to judge ANYONE on appearance,or any of the above stated remarks.I think when you belittle someone it’s wrong I accept ALL people without regard for how they live their life or what they look like.I think that’s shallow.my problem with this site at the moment is MOST ALL my matches are 21-28 live out of state or in another country.If this stupid personality test is soooo accurate then why these young girls who are young enough to be my daughters keep showing up?The other thing that is a problem is women who say they are MARRIED,or LOOKING,they shouldn’t be allowed to be on here if they are already taken.Men do this to I hear so I am not saying it is all LADIES doing this.As for you and Valerie I don’t know either of you but I am sure you both have profiles up right?I only require that you have pictures up,I like to see who I’m writing to.I have one up.Take it easy talk to ya soon.
i agree that alot of nice looking woman seem to be looking for something they already have, themselves, because they put pictures on pof that shows 90 % of their breasts and when u say they look nice they get offended and want to block u or not respond to e-mails. pictures in bathing suits, u kidding me, and then some will write and say, thanks !!!!! well that seems pretty shallow to me. if a woman thought i was hot and told me, id be very excited and want to e-mail that person for sure. it has its good points and then its bad but one thing they all agree on, i am lonely. i think we all work to darn much and then we get home and it clouds our thinking sometimes. hey e-mail me, ill write ya back.
What’s that sound I hear? Oh it’s moans & groans from the fat farm, oh please. More than half our country is over weight, I sure wouldn’t want to try and airlift one of ya from the roof of a flooded house. Take some responsibility. All you sweet kind caring people, try thinking of others for a change.
I met a guy too that kept on looking and when I confronted him he said oh i have to take it off. he never did and when i pressured him (bill) said oh i think i’m not ready for a committed relationship. Now I met one who thinks I’m SOOOO beautifu, and i think he is the most awsome guy in the wourld. Well my luck now i see him only every 10 days. I don’t know why. he doesn’t know what he wants and has what I need.I’m too hurt, I think I give up dating. Can’t take it anymore.
Ive been on POF for about a year. Although Ive had much more luck (in some regards) than most seem to be claiming, I still agree that it is being used as a chatroom by women to break up their boredom. I have all but given up on emailing them first..I usually wait to get mail from them first, because many of them read and delete even polite hellos. Some give nice replies, but about 33% dont reply at all. The new wave of responses on there, is for the woman to claim she has a boyfriend, and is just looking for “friends” For Gods sake, its a dating site, not a chat pal site. I agree with the critisism of the moderator also. If one says anything, and i mean ANYTHING, less than wonderful to a person, he/she has their profile immediately deleted, with no explanation at all, and no response to emails asking why. He gives no warning, he simply acts like Judge, Jury and Executioner. No fairness, no getting the other persons point of view, just immediate termination. As far as women go, they only respond to attractive pics. Before I had no picture, I got one response, after I posted pics, I got tons of mail. Shallow people huh? They all say they are looking for nice honest guys. Oh Please, if you arent good looking, they wont even give you a chance.
There is no such thing as a perfect dating site. There are jerks, sex fiends, shallow people, ugly people, good looking people, and the list goes on. You cannot judge a site by people’s behavior that you CANNOT control. You can only judge what the site has to offer, how well it offers it, and its value for the people.
I’ve dated men fat, thin, ugly, ok, handsome etc. Yes, a picture helps get beyond the shock that the person is really hot or ugly, but, to some people, such as me, I assess how my comfort level would be by reading their profiles, and yes, visually, a person’s face says a lot about them.
If you study psychology, you will learn that there are indeed aspects to a person’s facial features that either turn you off or on to a person. This study is called kinesics. Kinesics is the study of body language. Facial expressions fall in this category. I’ve seen people who have pictures where they look paranoid, mean, sad, or they have a blank look on their face. Some looks might signify mental illness! You might be coming off with a look that screams I’m dangerous, I’m too shy, or hopefully, I’m a happy go lucky person. Certainly, a picture is worth more than a thousand words.
Some References:
In Your Face: What Facial Features Reveal About the People You Know and Love (Paperback)
by Bill Cordingley (Author)
Face Language 2000 E-Z 10 Second Personality Speed Reading System: Advanced Social Technology for Today’s World (Paperback) by Jon E. Prescott (Author), David E. Prescott (Author)
Have you ever asked yourself why one person might think this person is hot or that person is not and you’re reaction is “you’re blind dude”? Simply put, we all see people differently. Studies show, that some people will actually look for a mate that reminds them of their parents or their self in some way!
There is a matter of reading into the profiles, too. A person that doesn’t put enough effort into a profile can be a turn off. If they can’t put effort into the profile, how’s our future relationship going to be?
You have to be careful how you word your profiles, too. I’m not perfect, but I have seen profiles that say, “I’m basically quiet and laid back”. What you are saying to me is, “I’m not a good conversationalist and you can say and do what you want, I don’t care, I just want a girlfriend”. Doesn’t sound like a person I would want to live with the rest of my life, does it?
Personally, I can say it is very difficult to turn any man away, because I’m more compassionate than most people. It’s not like I’m going to tell them, you have mean facial features, or you don’t put much effort into your profile. It’s easier to just say, “Thank you for your interest, but I don’t feel that we are a match. Good luck with your search.” I’ve had men write back arguing with me. Certainly, that’s not a good sign of what’s to come if I went out with them. Maybe my intuition was correct about this person. Maybe I was wrong. Ultimately, I follow my intuition and comfort level.
Obviously that leaves you hanging. WTF did I do wrong? Why didn’t she give me a chance? Simply put, it’s unavoidable, but you need to understand there is so much more involved in deciding if this person is dating material. If you’re really curious, try asking the person for a profile and/or picture assessment.
Personality plays a role in your profile. Do you write unique things, or do you write canned profiles? I see so many of the same profiles, they seem canned. But if you say, I love white water rafting, rafted the wild waters of whatever streams, gliding over dangerous rocks etc and here is a picture of me bla bla bla, you’ve clearly shown that you aren’t just BS’ing. You’re intriguing me.
Instead of site bashing or people bashing, let’s try to act like human beings, and try to help each other. There are forums where you can post your pictures and your profiles and get honest feedback. A lot of us can’t change our looks, or our personalities. We have to learn how to make the best of what we have to offer, and highlight it.
There will always be some kind of rejection. It hurts, it sux, it’s demeaning, it’s humiliating, yea, but I’m a good person. If you didn’t like me, and you’re not respectful or compassionate enough to tell me nicely, “Good luck, in your search, I just feel we aren’t compatible” then clearly they’re the one who lacks class.
And, I can tell you I have dated several men who BS how into you they are, and they string you along, drop you like a hot potato, and vanish, no reason whatsoever. So, looks don’t have everything to do with people’s choices. As stated above, there are many reasons you’ve been rejected, you just don’t know what they are, and that does hurt. I feel your pain, and I’ve been there, done that, too. At least I try to respond out of respect to that person, if only once. If only some of these guys (or women for you) would respond, too. Just be honest. “I’m not into you, it’s just me”.
IN reading what people have wrote here, It truly makes me a little sad. For one I am a sinlge mother, of a wonderful little boy, and if that turns you off, there is nothing I can do about it, however, its not because I am a slut, or a hoe bag that just laid in a bed when I was 20 and got preggers! If that is what your perception is, then your the shallow one. Also, I agree a photo tells alot about a person. Some people are not attracted to “overweight” people, however if they are “gods gift” then why are they using a internet dating site, they should have women falling down before them , and better yet, a FREE dating site??? Too cheap?? I dont know, I used it cuz my friend found her Mr. Right on here.
I do get a lot of repsonses on why my name is Tequila Princess, immediatly people think I am a drunk. Haha not at all.. we all have our drink of choice, and some do not drink at all… right? I porbably have drank 3 times in the last 3 months! It just a nick name one of my friends gave me while on Spring Break and it stuck and some people call me Princess TeQi! So it doesnt sound as bad.
I will say that I can be skeptical now who I am looking for on ANY TYPE of dating site, or chat line. My recent EX and I met online, and we were together for almost 2 years, only for me to find out that he too still frequented the dating service also, and started cheating. He met me when I was MY biggest and when I started going to the gym and working out (I had dropped so far 35 pooounds) he started seeing other women. When I caught him twice, yes twice with women who were “BBW” I just see that is the woman he is attracted to, although he was 6′6 and 200 (so skinny) But when I look back, his ex wife was BBW too, and lost weight he cehated on her too!!!!!!!!!!
They split…
It all in all who people are attracted to. You cannot get and because the guy you like doesnt like you back. Because there is someone out there for everyone.
***OH and btw, I have never had a probalem with MY MATCHES…you need to go into your account and edit your profile that you want to be matched with someone between this age and this age and withing however many miles of you. There are only two options within 20,000 miles or within 75 miles… there you go. I do believe it is under mail settings… dont quote me.
If your interested in chatting, male OR female and your from MN (I AM ALWAYS DOWN FOR NEW GIRLIE FRIENDS TOO!) you can find me, same screen name, and a few pics… TO THE MEN WHO DONT LIKE KIDS OR “A FEW EXTRA POUNDS” dont bother wasting your time, but I am good, genuine and big hearted, I just am tired of being alone. I want to share my life, my wonderful family and my dreams with someone!
~~Take Care~
P.s. I know Im gonna piss someone off one here, and for that I apologize. But this IS FOR what you wanna write, freedom of speech. THANKS!
Good comment, Chicgurl1974.
I’ve been on PoF for over a year. I have met at least two ladies whom I expect will be life-long friends as well as a few I communicate with on a regular basis. I am very selective as to whom I communicate with and always reply politely to inquiries I don’t wish to persue. What I’m truing to say is that I feel we each make our own experience. My cheif complaint about the site, and any other, is that posters seem to be unaware that there is such a thing as spell check and proper usage. Did it ever occur to anyone that a disorganized mind (language is a reflection of how you view the world) leads to a disorganized experience? Can it be otherwise?
Everyone I meet is my teacher. I am grateful for that. We used to live in the wild and have to face “natural” dangers and predators. Now we live in cities, and the predators are our own kind. If you get up in the morning and have a life, you know this. Why would a dating site be different? Why would you not take the same precautions? “It’s a jungle out there” is not just an off handed assesment. It is the actual condition of living. Yet it is possible to have what you want if you accept what IS and make your own world. If all the energy used to argue with reality was used to image and percipitate what we want into our experience, it would be a different world, as far as I can see.
Hello My Dear,
As I can empathize with your situation and I commend you on being a good and loving mother, as that is by far the most important job in the entire world. My comment to you and possibly some advice when putting your feelings down on a public place for all to read…do a bit of editing and spell checking before you post it. And if you wish to be considered serious and ‘genuine’, then try not to use so many ‘hip’ slang type verbages.
I do not know your age but as I was a very young single mother myself I understand that the obsticles young people have to get through, let alone trying to raise a child is sometimes overwhelming.
My thoughts to you, as I’m now a grandmother of 3 beautiful grandsons is to take a few moments (or as long as you may need) to reflect on your thoughts and feelings, take the positive from the experience and move on. Do not dwell. Learn from it. And don’t forget to smile…your child will be forever imprinted by your actions and behavior.
Peace!
Kathi
There are good and bad of both genders on these sites. I’ve not had great luck perhaps because I’m older and of a larger size. But then again, the average woman in this country is a size 14. I did meet someone I spent time with who claimed to be looking for “one woman for life.” That turned out to be a lie. He’s just looking for Internet titillation as are so many men on these sites. If that’s what someone wants, just email “fun” then say so and leave the rest of us alone who are actually seeking real life friendships and more. As for beauty, it’s in the eye of the beholder. Ever notice how we don’t judge our friends for their looks? Why the, are we so harsh on potential new friends? This is not a shopping network for a new “pet” is it? Obviously, it is just that for some. To the good people on here, do not let your self-image be hurt by those kind of people. You don’t need them. Let them suffer in the misery of their own making. And never apologize for having children. They are blessings. Anyone who doesn’t realize that is just, well, a sad, sorry person.
Charles might be a young guy that wants to start a family fresh… and I dont blame him. I have been a single mother for 17 years and all of you know how hard it is to blend the families… Todays divorce rate has caused alot of us to be in this situation, but it doesnt mean we have the right to bash someone who doesnt want the baggage. I wont even date someone who doesnt have or want children, they have no idea what my life is really like.
This a good site to find out the truth quickly about the woman I will say that for pof they have built the site well in that order and i commend them for it. I am a attractive single parent with a good future looking to find a genuine good person to marry. This is not the site to find that. about 70% of the woman that claim to not want any “players ” are players themselves. they waste your time talking a little then you realize after you have wasted time that they are just on here for midweek attention.And have no intention of ever going any further. A very good hint to this is on the bottom of the profile at the “appears on — favorites list” this seems to be a score card that these woman get a rush out of how many men will choose them, Not cool, at all . I suggest run from these attention lovers of themselves. but again , thank you pof for designing a good site . just thought i would say my part. oh and 20% are so large they never will get a date , there are 10% good in here , but just as fishing you have weed some out , not all fish are good to take home. thanks tom
First I have to say that I PREFER a full figured woman,( that means anyone from 5 pounds to 75 pounds over weight.. thats just me ) but I also date women of all shapes and sizes.. I joined Plentyoffish hoping to find someone that would like to go out and do things, dinner,dancing, movies, just be social in general, make friends and hopefully meet “the one”.
I have posted a thoughtful profile put up 8 pictures, I’ve emailed a few women some nice letters introducing myself while telling them a little about me and I’d ask them if they have any interest to email me and say hi..mostly to get no reply OR catty/rude replies or one line responses.
It seems most women don’t want to find a decent man that is also a proud dad.
On PoF it seems the better your picstures the more people will add you as a “favorite”.
I’ve taken my profile down for now but I may go back again, I’m not sure.
Or maybe its a sign of these times when old fashioned values are no longer part of the dating system.
Women on PoF are just another example of why (now) jaded over jilted guys like me are “going foreign.”
What do I mean?
Too many “What can you do for me?” and “How much money do you make?” attitudes.
Oh, and I love this one: “My children are my life!” Exactly, I say, so why would a SNK guy want to date you!?
I was on and off POF a few times. I never posted a photo. I wanted to try to form a friendship before the guy knew what I looked like. I met one guy in particular. We had numerous emails, text messages and phone calls over a long time span. Got along great. We lived quite a distance apart. I had no way of putting a photo on line. I actually sent him still photos in the mail. The jerk wouldn’t even send them back. He probably sleeps with them under his pillow. I am not a photogenic person, told him that, and what do I get… “Delete, not read” mail. How inconsiderate can one person be. I just wish everyone would know that even without meeting in person, the way people tell them they are not interested hurts people just as much as it would if you met and dated. He broke my heart (as a friend) and truly gave me a phobia of on line dating. Have some “class” and be a man. If you were so perfect, you probably wouldn’t be on an on-line dating sight. I could only dream that the guy that I am referring too can figure this out. I can only wish that I could say who he is and where he’s from just to prevent any other woman from being led on and then crushed. But then I think, how fortunate I am that I never got sexually involved with such a fool. I thank God everyday that he showed me how much of a jerk he is right up front. This is for you “Kev”. I see you’re still there, I got married. Met someone the old fashioned way.
I have also found that MOST not ALL but “alot” of people on the POF site (and many more) are looking for nothing more than a fling or sexfest. Many are married and that ruins it for the ones that are honest like myself. I am not online to chat~chat~chat all day either. I am here as merely another avenue to possibly meet somneone for a long lasting relationship as I know that we never are sure where or when that special person might be right in front of our eyes.
SO…IF there are any decent real MEN~> not boys,in NW-Central WI or Eastern MN..or willing to relocate,IF all is GREAT and you are looking for MUCH more than~~>meaning more than a quick fling for physical satisfaction ONLY, get to me I want a heck of alot more out of life than that!
Jodi
look folks, god made everyone different for a reason. big, little, skinny, fat whatever. everyone has there own preference and you can not change what a person’s perference is. i myself am a bbw and 99% of the men i have dated were skinny and liked a bbw, so if you are a bbw don’t give up, there are men out there that do like bbw’s. you have to pray for the people who are shallow and hateful and judge people period, not just for looks. whether on earth or in heaven they will get theirs, don’t worry!
I agree for the most part. The women just like the men exagerate like crazy. One womensaid she was a race care driver which was true she did a free test drive at a promotional event once and never again. Game players or multiple players. My friend a perfect descent women met her now husband a man of equal character. No ryme or reason. Nothing is constant. If they are normal they are abnormal. If you expect nothing and mostly exageration you will be on target.
The name of the site is Plenty of Fish– that means that there is someone on here for everyone. It does not mean that everyone on here is going to be exactly what you are looking for. Just like in the “real” world there are people on here who are looking for good looking people, or people without kids. I am fat (or BBW or whatever they are calling it these days). I am not angry because there are men who are looking for thin women. Everyone has a right to look for what is going to make him/her happy. I don’t want to meet men who have to watch football every Sun. It doesnt make me shallow, it makes me self-aware. If I already know this is going to irritate me, why pursue it. There are other men who dont watch football. I dont expect to like everyone or to have everyone like me.
Lets try to keep this in perspective. The people on this site are people who live in the “real” world and just like the “real” world there are fat people, liars, people just looking for fun, people looking for a soul mate, married people looking around– in fact every type of person who exists in the real world. It’s just easier to weed them out because they have the basic info right out there for all to see. I have met nice people on here and I have met jerks, just like I did when I was meeting men the traditional way.The problem is not with the site but rather with people’s unrealistic expectations of the site. It’s a dating site for everyone, even jerks. Live and let live.
The only valid criticism I found when reading these comments was that too often people lack the good manners to respond to an email. If someone says Hi to me on the street, I say Hi back. If I get a message on POF from someone I am not interested in I still say Hi and thanks for the message but I am not interested in married men or men who live 20,000 miles away, etc.
this is supposed to mean there are plenty of women on this site to meet, however all i found were cows, like someone let the whole lot of them get off the farm. if you like big women this is your heaven, if you would prefer to weigh more than your date, LOOK ELSEWHERE.
Currently, I have the misfortune to join, hoping to find a woman I would have alot in common. Instead, I’ve been given the worst matches known to humanity. Worst yet, the site would not let me become me. They expect me to be a certain way, in order to land the perfect match. What a crock of s**t! That’s why I am closing my POF account, and open an account with a different, free dating site, where I can find the perfect match.
GOOD FRACKIN’ RIDDANCE PLENTY OF FISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have sat and read what everyone has to say. I have to tell you that I can see the point to most everyone’s comments. I have had good and bad experiences on POF as well. It’s really no different then dating any other way I suppose. I have deleted messages and not responded and had it done to me as well. I guess I am just a little more thick-skinned then most. I take that to mean they are simply not interested and I move on. I have had friends that post things that are untrue and old photos. I, myself, don’t understand their way of thinking. I look at it like this…I have nothing to loose. I like to think I’m smart enough to weed through the “JERKS” and find those that are serious. I too have children, and that is very evident upfront. If a man is shallow enough to pass us by because we are mothers that is truly THEIR loss. I am also very outspoken and upfront about most things and I can tell you from experience, most men can’t handle a woman with her own opinion on things. It becomes very frustrating. I urge you women, regardless of size, to be patient. I am trying to be patient as well. There is someone out there for all of us and I have to believe that. Take the time to talk and get to known someone well before meeting and moving on. Look at their profile and if there are any questions of doubt, move on. The “Prefer Not To Say” and blank areas would be a good indicator that he his more then likely NOT worth your time. Having your heart stepped on really stinks. There are no words to describe the feeling of rejection. I hope each and every one of you find happiness no matter what site it may come from. If you can handle a strong woman, feel free to look me up!
I have had one horrible and one dud on this site.
the horrible one was with a guy who had an awsome profile on screen but in person, he was a lecherous, bible quoting Jehovah witness. I was spiritually and emotionally “raped” and dont know why i didnt kick him in the cajones. I learned a valuable lesson and am not going to repeat is..
So you cant always believe what you read.
i guess you might just be too ugly to find a date
i thought i was the only one,,,pof is prejudice, and very rude,,,to any race other than white,,,,i,ll never get on there again…
Ive been on POF a couple of times now and the first time seemed more of a waste of time than anything. The people that responded where,to say the least, NOT what I was looking for. Most had photos that were years out of date and a few just simply wanted nasty pictures and werent at all interested in meeting. Quite a few rude people on here who feel it necessary to respond to every single ad on here and spew ignorant remarks where none were asked for. I gave it a break for a while and came back to POF with a better sense of what replies I MIGHT get. This time has been pretty cool. The replies have been great and the people have actually been real. While its easy to get discouraged maybe sometimes it just takes pulling a few weeds to get to the flowers( no mushiness intended..LOL).best way I can tell someone is to let them come to you that way you know in someway that there IS an interest.and you can figure out from there if they are for real or some 400 pound dirty old pervert just looking for a time wasting thrill off of someone.
calling some one ugly is juvenile . People are honestly here to meet someone and it never fails there is always someone with an ignorant remark because they think its funny. this is not high school its grown life and if your so childish as to make comments like that maybe its YOU who are the ugly one and you are just lashing out at everyone because you know it. and its pretty sad that the moderator of this site would even POST those kinds of remarks.
I have just gone onto POF since I had not much luck on sites that I had paid for. I heard this was free and one of the fastest growing sites. Well, I guess that is true because it seems everyone and their brother is on here. Looking for one thing apparently…..I will probably never get another email because of all the restrictions I have had to put on….I also do not want to be anyone’s “favorite”…so I take myself off as fast as they put me on…get a freaking Playboy magazine…I don’t want to be anyone’s fantasy cyber girl…I am pretty disgusted…..the internet is probably the worst thing to happen to men and woman’ relations…it is now a war zone….no one trusts anyone else..how can you? everyone has a computer and they can just go on and “fish” whenever they need a new thrill…..
I hear that married trooper
guy who just killed his pregant girfriend was trolling this site…did anyone meet him? what a creep!
It sounds like some bitter women with skewed ideas about men, and some who also have trouble with spelling and grammar. First, if a man doesn’t think he can handle having someone else’s children at this time, that does NOT make him shallow, it makes him honest and realistic. If a man or woman wants to see pictures, that is common and even necessary. We all are initially attracted by outward appearances, men more so that women. That’s what has kept the human race propagating. If you feel your appearance is against you, I’m sorry for you. Do something about it, and stop your whining! Good luck to all.
To Diane:
Maybe you should throw your computer away and just stay at home watching lifetime.
Don’t flatter yourself to much. Men can have anything they want in a cyber girl just by going to any porn search engine.
Get a life, Get over yourself, when your ready for a relationship I’m sure a few of the less intelligent guys will be waiting for you.
Mothers,
We constantly hear the same thing over and over from you: I have X kid(s) and “there my life” “there my world” blah blah blah
Look, just because a guy doesn’t want to be involved with a single mother doesn’t make him a bad guy. We can understand that that can make you upset. But at least we are being truthful and we want a relationship to start out the right way without “your life” “your world” in the middle.
ALSO……..
It must really take a man alot to leave a woman who had his child.
SO….
What do you think a single guy with no kids is gonna think about you?
(she must be a real pain in the ass if the guy left her AND the kid)
just a word of caution for any ladies who have been contacted by, or is corresponding with a member called Sizzlenhot. Not only does this man have no job, only income is a monthly disability check, a compulsive liar, dishonest,a definite mean streak, in very poor health, I could go on, but most important he is also married.
YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING? A SITE that is prejudiced against everyone but whites? I have never responded to a post or forum of any kind, but that was such an ignorant remark I had to push the “reply” button. Get over yourself. With an attitude like that, it’s no wonder you feel the “site” is against you…maybe you just have a crappy personality. This reply to you doesn’t reflect well on MINE, either, I know, but gimme a break with the race card crap. I have not had any luck on here, either, but maybe because that’s because others don’t find my picture attractive or like what I have to say on my profile. Not ONCE would I EVER think “WAH, it’s because I’m white!” I think I’ll go eat worms. Geez.
Hello
I’ve just started here, and I intend to give it a shot. $53 indicated men are more “visually” prone. Well, I’m one of those women who is visually prone.
I can’t imagine anyone simply going for a person simply because they’re “nice”. I’m not desperate, and a man HAS to be at least what my definition of good-looking is.
Too many women settle for the Beast because a man’s purse is more attractive than his person.
Take care.
R
Seriously…..
I just think some folks here are taking this site far too seriously. You all know how many men tend to be, and if you’re truly in search of your “mate”, then maybe, just maybe you should lighten up and try expecting nothing from the men or this site.
An old Chinese proverb: “He who expects nothing shall never be disappointed”
Men tend to think that because we [women] are on a site such as this one, that we’re not only desperate, but horny and lonely to boot.
I tend to take these sorts of things in stride - and see them more as a distraction, from my animated life. And IF a Real Man tends to appear, then you’re pleasantly surprised as opposed to disgustingly disappointed.
R
User review #4 is a bit naive. He asks where are all the single ladies who aren’t divorced with children.
Well #4…if that’s what you seek, then you should find yourself a good bible-based church, not to mention a different decade.
Most adult females with any sort of life experience have been involved with at least 2 men and not to mention…most of YOU men have children yourself.
And are you saying that simply because a woman has children that she cannot be nice nor a Lady?
I think you’re searching for a GIRL as opoposed to a Woman. Start combing the high-schools and see how lucky you get.
Really Women! I’m a woman but here’s the low-down.
People should have what they desire in another person, whether that desire is as shallow as two feet of water. You needn’t try validating yourself as a great person because you’re big & attempting to get these mens’ attention. He’s not going to like fat women no matter what. That may be morally repugnant behavior, but it’s not illegal and at least you have the satisfaction of knowing where they’re coming from up front. I personally have a problem with fat men…especially once they…disrobe. I take good care of myself, and fat men frighten the Hell out of me; them huffing & puffing is not my idea of a good evening. I also have a disdain for guys with stomachs that look like they’re in their 2nd trimester. It’s all personal, and also indicative of a person not caring about their health.
On the other hand, there are men who would not look twice at skinny women,,,for the same reasons. I persoanlly am one of the middle of the road women…the ones no one ever addresses. Either they’re talking about overweight women or skinny women. There are the gray areas in life..the 10’s 12’s & 14’s of the world.
So…women…please…try not sounding so desperate and offended because [many] men are basically just being….well…men. If they don’t want to be around your children, then great…maybe THEY’RE the ones not good enough to be around anybody’s children. Good to know that ahead of time.
As for you guys searching for Victoia’s Secret Models…. get yourselves a catalogue…because you don’t have a CHANCE or the $$ for them.
Smooches..
R
And also to ” ROBIN 622 ” You need to find ur happy place and stop hateing on us BBW ! It’s not like we woke up one morning and said hey I want to be fat ! And as far as ur comment goes about not likeing men with a tummy r no Pamela Anderson ur - self , I guess we know why ur single now !
This is for Timbo # 11,16 & 19. I am overwieght and I am judged for that. I was told to put BBW down.I’m 5″ 3′ and I am overwight but I do have an hour glass figure in the right clothes. people in general are CRUEL to overweight people. They treat us like we have a contagious disease.The men I have met in peron on POF, haven’t bothered to call or text me again and wont respond to my EMAILS on POF. As for the people sending you messages w/ no picture you can go to Mail Setting and put no in the box, so you dont receive anymore. I am independent,caring and take care of myself and no man has ever taken care of me except my DAD. Men who IM me want 2 have sex by phone or sex by webcam. I am a better person than that.
Valerie, I am 5″3′ and I am overweight as well. I put BBW on my profile because my size is (B)ig, I’m (B)eautiful, I’m a (W)oman. So BBW is not a lie. I am voluptuous but BBW describes me better. There is only 1 man on here I can say is a Gentleman. It seems most men want a “TROPHY” on their arm. I may not look like a “Trophy” but my heart has “Champion” written all over it. Valerie dont just settle for anyone, I’m not. If a man doesn’t want a good-hearted woman, that is his loss. Good luck in your search. “Remember the world would be boring if we all were the same”.
User #43 Bri Bssr. I’m a BBW. Let me tellyou that I was thin until 10 years ago when I had Surgery. They cut 3′ by 3′ to take out scar tissues which was attached to my muscles and Nerves. I walked did sit ups and swam yet nothing worked because the muscles were not attached and I still dont have much feeling there. So when something happens to you and you are looked down on whether it me in love or a job, remember when you did the same thing.
To reviewer 55:
You sound conceited. Have you thought a woman might be single mother because the Father died.??
Not all single mothers& singlefather’s are single by choice. i worked witha guty who got his girlfriend pregnant at 15 y/o. Yet he raised the daughter not the mom, because SHE wanted to go and be irresponsible and do bad things. Are you under 25 yers old. Either way, GROW UP and think GROWN UP. I know father’s who have given away parental rights because they didnt want to pay child support and the daughter had her mother raise 2 of her kids. That’s sad. !!!! Before you judge someone you should know why she/he is a single parent.
For truth #55.
This is for you stupid comment:
It must really take a man alot to leave a woman who had his child.
SO….
What do you think a single guy with no kids is gonna think about you?
(she must be a real pain in the ass if the guy left her AND the kid)
For your information my ex chose a computer life over his children and me. He got involved in some immoral stuff on the computer and didn’t want to give it up to save our marriage. He quit being a father or husband for the last 10 years of our marriage but I tried to stick it for our kids. It was not an easy choice to end a marriage of 20 yrs and to know someone chose a computer life over our kids and me. I do not appreciate your comment that it must be the womans fault that he left his kids and her. Sometime we leave because the men are the pain in ass.
Yes my children are important to me that is the way it is supposed to be. But my partner would also be important and I think the point that most women are trying to make is that we are not going to put our children on the back burner that they are part of the package.
I saw the link for these comments on POF and out of curiousity read through almost all of them. I have my own comments to state.
Firstly, anyone that is going to complain about dating sites, the type of people that are on them, etc, are not realistic individuals. You need to weed through all of the bad apples to get to the good ones and it does not happen overnight. There are all different people on all of the different sites who all want different things. Keep your eyes open and take time to get to know them before even meeting them. Make sure you send or post RECENT pictures. If someone does meet you, they will see the real you and not trust you going forward.
Should someone not be interested in a woman with a child or children, why would you want to be with them? A single guy with no kids does not understand what having a child means and you have to respect what they want and what they do not understand. I have a child but do not think I could handle someone with 3 or 4 kids…does that make me a bad person? I think not. I would be lying to myself and to some guy when I know I cannot handle that many kids. Both he and I are better off finding someone with situations we can live with. To the guy that said horrible things about not wanting a single mother because the father of the kid did not want her, think again. At times it is the woman that does not want the man, as it was in my case.
In addition, have thick skin. No one is obligated to reply to any email at any time. If they are interested they will reply, if not, they won’t. Simple.
Next, pictures do matter, we all have a certain “type” we are attracted to initially. After that it is all personality. This isn’t vain or shallow, it is reality.
Sadly there are ignorant people everywhere, but happily there are good people everywhere too. No matter what dating site you go to, you will find all of the same issues everyone is complaining about. Go into it with realistic expectations and keep your eyes open for the signs that they are not who they say they are! good luck!
ok, for anyone downing bbw’s, not all fat people are fat because of eating. a vegetarian can be fat for eating healthy, someone may have a tyroid problem, someone may have had an accident and can’t walk, put yourself in someone else’s shoes for one day that is overweight and see how it feels. i know a person that was skinny and all of the sudden started gaining weight out of the blue, it was a actual disease causing it, so don’t automaticallt assume bbw’s, male or female are fat from food, if you are uncertain, you have the internet, USE IT!!!!!!
To the woman, that said about givin up on datin. Don’t! There are alot of men that are jerks, as well as woman. If they say their goin to call ya, most likely they won’t, been there, done that. I know its frustratin and all. Its so hard to trust people these days, why can’t people just be real and honest. Keep your chin up, it will all work out. Bless you.
Good evening - after having read the comments about plenty of fish it does reinforce some opinions I have held about that site for the past couple of years - I joined a few years ago with the prospect of meeting someone that would like to share life experiences with me (both good and bad) only to find that once the “women” saw that I was a musician and had pics with my guitars (I even posted some regular pics too) immediately I was “prejudged” as “high maintenance”, “player”, “unfaithful” etc…………
WOW! My response to all that “time wasting” is that you (women) would not recognize an actual “nice guy” if he had reached out and bit you!
About 95% of my online dating experiences have wound up with either sending an e-mail or two then never hearing from the woman again or meet them and then the same thing - never hear from them again - I guess women these days don’t know how to handle an actual “nice guy” - seems they would rather have the “bad boys” and complain about them!
To be honest I am just about ready to cancel my account for the second time because of the people on the site - not the fault of the site itself!
POF has a good concept but just has some pretty poor representation of dating prospects for both men and women! They may “look great on paper” but when the time comes for the first meeting - BUYER BEWARE!
What ever happened to the “good old days” of meeting people in person and forming a relationship from there??? Any women want an actual “nice guy”??? LOL!
I’ve been on POF for a number of years with a profile in South Florida. One of the members here on 5/29 asked “where are all the nice looking single ladies at with no children”. This isn’t a hostile question at all. Most of us single guys are not really interested in helping raise another mans kids. Why would a female feel that it is necessary to criticise a man just because he elects not to play the role of “stooge”? Since nealy 80% of the people on POF seem to be looking for a LTR, it makes sense to be honest about ones desires and dislikes. It’s only natural that most men would prefer to court a truly available woman who hasn’t already commited her heart to another mans offspring. - Lets get real folks. Why should I consider myself less deserving of having my own family?
Reading through the comments regarding POF I decided to post my own. A first date was arranged with this guy for a Saturday night, even to the point of where we were going. He seemed genuine and as if he was really interested. He kept asking if my photo’s were recent (they are) but as i thought he was just making conversation I jokingly replied you will see for your self on Saturday. At 10pm on the Friday (night before the date) he text and cancelled saying it wasnt the best idea and then went on to say Good Luck in the future as if I was desperate and would eventually hopefully get a date! I was really cross. Not that I was bothered about meeting him but that the majority of my friends are all settled with partners, some with children so to try and find something else to do on a Saturday night is virtually impossible. I ended up staying in. Come on guys be a bit thoughtful. Either follow it through or cancel well in advance!
Reply to Julie - my thoughts are that if I were to arrange a date with a lady I would go ahead and follow it through! You never know if it would be “the one” or not if you didn’t take the chance - I would feel awful if I really had to cancel out a date - only time that happens is if something pressing has happened at work - otherwise I really don’t like to step away from anything.
I am being honest here - c’mon guys - don’t lead the ladies on and then drop them like a hot potato!!!!
It is no wonder a lot of the women don’t trust the men anymore after being treated the way they are treated - like objects instead of a “living, loving, breathing person!”
I joined 5 days ago, and met a few nice men. But for the most part, I agree asking if the pics are updated, asking for sex, when I’ve made it clear Im a lady, not a slut! One guy drove 1 1/2 hours and nearly ran me over, when he saw me and guess he too thought he was getting sex. I never got in the vehicle with him, but too many have false profiles, and are into pictures, and just want a Booty Call! I say call a Hooker and leave me alone! My son is going to be 18, he has a father, Im not looking for anyone to play one. The site is not the greatest, I fully agree there! And LTR’s are usually intimate encounters on Plenty of fish!
As far as P of F is concerned, I met four men there. The first one I might have been able to get serious with, BUT he was a control freak. The second one was a creep who was only interested in sex. He was old, thinning hair, skinny body, as if he had some sort of disease, and a sunken-in face. The more I think about it, I am convinced he might have had AIDS. And the creep wanted to have sex. The third guy I met posted an old, flattering picture. When he showed up, he was not the good-looking man depicted in his picture, just a funny-looking older man. The last guy I met (man #4) submitted a picture that did not look like himself, was dressed goofy, and expected me to pay for my own drink. Incidentally, I am also on SinglesNet.com, and have fared no better. I am convinced that men think they can lie, cheat, and go after sex, and be cheapskates, because it is the Internet, and not a real world. Well, I have news for guys like you — I will dump you even faster than I would in the real world. My advice, try as many dating sites as you can. Somewhere out there in this infinite internet, there has to be an honest guy.
Wow! I just joined POF because I thought I might meet a nice older guy interested in a friend,possibly later romance, now after reading the comments from members and former members, I am just disturbed. Folks, lighten up! Did you REALLY join expecting to meet Mr. or Miss Perfect, if they were that great, would they be on a computer dating site? Come on! Are’nt you all just looking? Curious? If you want to meet someone who is really looking for a relationship, join a church singles group for Gosh Sake, and stop using your time to air your personal bitches, and pity parties!If you are willing to pay $40.00, you can check them out online and find out if they are felons or have a record,including a marriage license!This is just like having a pen-pal, nothing more, Have Fun!That is what these sites are really for.
I’ve been on POF for a few months and have noticed the gals are just as bad as the men. 15 year old photos if they even post a photo at all. They will cut off dialoguing for no good reason. Sometimes it feels like they are there to boost their egos (Am I still desirable) Saw one gals profile where she’s on 455 guys favorites lists. I’m not after sex on the first date, as my profile states. I treat ladies like ladies. I get no response after messaging a few times when I ask if they’d like to meet for coffee to get acquainted. I always return messages in a timely manner even if I’m not interested in the person writing me. When a woman says she doesn’t play games, LOOK OUT, she does.
I have met one guy on pof and we had a 3year relationship which just cooled off to freindship. I was IM with a guy who really wanted to meet me–then I found out he was just not happily married and was looking for sex. Most guys either do not answer the email or will email a few times and stop. I appreciate honesty and would really like these guys to say “I don’t think you are what I am looking for” or something discreet like that!!What is wrong with some courtesy these days? I do admit that some ladies are probrably just as bad. All in all,I think there are good people on the sight—it just takes a lot of work to find them. Yes I am overweight, but I do make that clear–usually in the first email. I simply tell them if they are looking for Beautiful and slim, it’s not me!! Be honest and you just may get honesty in return.
I joined a few months ago. The site is ok. I can’t really blame the site for anything. I have a fairly athletic lifestyle I am not interested in overweight women or older women. I seem to get the most response from that particular demographic. The service is free and seems to be about the same as the free sites. I have met a few flakey women on the site, but I can’t blame pof for that either. I will keep fishing.
I haven’t dated anyone on POF yet but I hope it might be a little different than the last couple of times i tried at other dating sites, well 2 anyway.
I do consider myself to be a good guy and a good catch but when i met the 4 or 5 women from the dating sites i nearly died! They had posted pics from many years ago, honestly if you had shown me the pictures in advance i wouldn’t have been able to pick these girls out of a lineup.
I’m not saying I didnt date them because they were ugly, i went on a date, took them to dinner and was a very nice guy but never called them again. Not because of their looks but because they were liars and were playing games. Just take a look at the photos, usually they show 3 or 4 of their favorites and then sure enough there’s the one that looks like their grandmother, THATS THE ONE to look at, thats the one they look like! Girls we don’t care about what you USED TO look like we’re not dating you ten years ago, we want to know what you look like now, because you can tell if someone is your type a lot easier with a picture I think we all agree to that but not from a 10 year old picture. As a matter of fact your making things worse for yourselves because you show us a beautiful picture of yourself 10 years ago and next to it a picture of you now! Thats not flattering to you, just show your current photo, I mean hell you know we’re gonna find out the truth. Right?
It can be fun but as the saying goes, you get what you pay for. You have to weed through a lot of really bad weeds that cause itches and irritations. A lot of liars and way too many people who are married and say they are single. I personally know 4 people on that site that are married, say they are single but are not. I am separated, honest about it and getting divorced. You really have to weed through all the profiles and pay attention to pictures. Look in the backgrounds for clues as to how old the picture is. I also get a lot of young men looking for the older woman experience. Pa-Leas!!!!
I’ve been using this site on and off for over 2 years, and only ever managed to meet one person! I’ve found many potentialy compatible women in this time and written hundreds of well meaning letters, and usually got no reply.. The facts are that most women on this site are not serious at all about actually meeting someone, no matter how compatible they appear. My ‘ideal’ woman has turned up quite a few times, but they all stopped corresponding sooner or later, presuambly because ‘mr right’ - read mr rich and handsome.. came along. Cynical? you bet! The bottom line is this is a FREE site and people treat it as such, in other words if it’s free there is no value in it, so dont take it seriously. Those are my opinions as a long term dissolusioned user. My advice is join a paysite if you really want to find someone.
Tom review #83 is right. Because its a freesite, women get bombarded with mail which means theyre not going to take anybody who messages them seriously. I read on one profile of a woman who was registered for only a week and she received 900 messages and 135 favorites.
As a man, I’ve been registered for the same period of time and received 1 favorite and 2 messages from the same person.
It sums it up, the site is there to be abused, no one is going to take it seriously, made worse by the fact that majority of people on the site are timewasters…i.e looking for friends, activity partners, email chat, intimiate encounters, if POF want to take the site seriously they need to get rid of the timewasters and not allow those categories on the site in the first place. You’re probably better off trying to contact a friend of a friend on facebook for a date.
I have the following thought on internet dating;
It is PART of the dating process.
It is NOT the ENTIRE dating process
Losing or Winning in the Dating Process depends a lot on YOUR energy and YOUR delivery of YOUR image as an individual.
Are YOU truthful in YOUR profile?
Are YOU posting a picture thats 100% truthful?
Are YOU stating facts on YOUR page?
Are YOU realistic in YOUR search process?
Are you sending messages that reflect that spark to get a return reply?
I don’t believe you should blame your problem on Plenty of Fish because it is not their problem if you can’t get a date…maybe you should consider plastic surgery and also develop some self esteem since it sounds like you OVERALL you have issues…Accept Responsiblities for your own actions and problems..get off the internet, go out and find some one on your own…in everything in life there is no GUARANTEE EXCEPT FOR SALVATION….
I have been on this for almost 3 years and have met 2 ladies that were a waste of time. Most women don’t respond even to a friendly hello. They are looking for a fantasy guy or a younger guy that will come rescue them from the rut they are in and they judge one by the picture. Once I emailed about 100 women at once, fat,skinny,short,tall,ugly,pretty and all races just to see how many would respond and I got 2 emails. I responded to them and never heard from them again. It’s free, what else can I say. I guess I’ll try something else.
Most women say they are looking for a nice guy or a good guy that will treat them “like a lady” someone who is honest and likes kids or they say “will only respond if you a picture” I have 6 and they still don’t respond. Well, here I am and no one responds. I think most women on POF are full of hot air. Look for me
I met 2 women on POF and went on a date with them. One was local and turned out to be very possesive so I ended that after a month and she was pissed then I met another from another state and that was good for about a year and we visited each other and it was ok and I thought I found Ms. Right for me and was getting ready to move there to be by her but she had issues with her ex and other issues so we ended it and we’re still friends. I’m still on the site as (solome) I don’t blame the site for anything. I just think women there just don’t know what they want or just looking for some fantasy guy to rescue them from the single rut they are in. I respond to all that email me why can’t they do the same. It’s called courtesy.
I agree with review #83. There are alot of jerks and time wasters on this sight. I am amongst the few women that are looking for a long term relationship one day. The replys I get from people asking for my bra size and crap are ridiculous! I’m not here looking for a one night stand. I tried it because I don’t do the bar scene and the supermarket wasn’t working. ha ha
I don’t think money and looks are what people should go for. Unfortunatly, they do! I’m average on my profile, but I’m happy with myself. I’ll keep looking until I find someone that can appreciate me for who i am, not what size chest I have.
Funny how the moderator on pof has her profile up on another site as looking for someone but claims she`s only on pof as a moderator & not looking, and I also agree in reguards to most of the female contacts wanting to treat the males that contact them as just something to complain about in the forums—guess misery does love company lol
I have been on POF since March. I have met a few men but none who I can take seriously. Everyone were dishonest or players. They all say they are nice guys but I find out they mostly want to see how many women they can date at once.
I have been a menber of POF for a few months now. I have yet to meet a nice man. Most are looking for sex or wants to just play games. I’m not a player so not into what they are looking for. I wonder is there sucha thing as a nice man left. Also they so shallow about looks, I’m a bbw and you’d be surprise how many men won’t even give you a second look. Never mind getting to know you. What a joke for a dating site.
I used PoF. I get literally like, 20 messages a day. I specifically put in my profile what I’m looking for. Yes I’m looking in the 18-25 age range. Yes I am looking for someone within 20 miles of my area. Yes I am looking to DATE someone, not just talk online/have them ask me what color my panties are on the phone. And YES you must be thin/athletic and atractive, because I am.
Now tell me, if all of that is SPECIFICALLY stated in my profile, why do I keep getting 43 year old fat men from Texas messaging me? Why waste my time and yours and try to convince me “Oh no, I’m really a great guy! I’d show you a good time even though I live in another state”
Plenty of Fish was recommended to me by a friend who had heard that it it the BEST DATING site. So, I joined a few weeks ago. I have sent out emails and favored about 10 men…..no one has given me the courtesy of saying “I’m not interested. The only man that I have been corresponding with is that met on match.com almost 2 years and dated for a year. We have stayed friends. The emailing back and forth is more play that serious. I find that other sites that have fees produce much better results. I’m very disappointed with Plenty of Fish.
hmmm I`ve just read through some of these replys…a lot of truth in some…unhappiness in others….yes, the women are looking for rich and handsome…the men are looking for sexpots and beautiful…nothing wrong with either! pics,,whoa, a few oldies there yes, men and women…I myself find this venue to be a perfect place to be totally honest…NOBODY CARES! yes, a lot of it is based on looks..guys…get rid of the beergut and try dressing a little better…women…common…loose a little weight, you want the men to….me..I`m kinda lucky…I resemble tom selleck, 6`3 own a stable business…I get lots of women…trouble is…there`s not a lot of keepers out there…maybe i`m not quite the greatest either..hmmm….be humble…don`t put a lot of faith in this site…have fun with it…remember…the name is “plenty of fish”….thats been a saying for years and years…long before this site….and really..if you`d stop trying so hard..it might get easier……I know that sometimes loneliness gets a little hard to take and we wonder if we will ever be happy again…be a good person and it will be better…goodluck to all! tony
I have been on a few dates here on POF and have been disappointed. I have found that the women that I have met have either lied about their age or their weight. Some of the photos that are posted are ten years or older. I mean come on ladies sooner or later the lies are gonna catch up with you. I also believe that they are not serious about being in a real relationship, whether it be long term or just dating. It almost feels like I am back in high school and they enjoy playing head games. Also, the dates feel like your on some kind of job interview to go out on a second date. It is very frustrating to say the least.
……..I have to agree with people judging just by a picture and not getting to know who you are, I for one am blessed to be born with good looks, now my body I work on and for 46 if I didnt tell you, you would not believe it, especially if you were just looking at my body, more like a 20-30 old range, so I am discriminated in a different way, Im not taken seious cause they see my looks as being someone who would be a player and so on. But I have to say I have always been a one woman man and have much more luck meeting quality people being out there not at home in front of a monitor. Now for you ones that are bbw, Im sorry but if someone does not want you because your big, I cant blame anybody for having thier own kind of taste, if you go out Im sure you will have better luck as I do cause there are people who do go for bbw, dont waste your time on pof if its not working for you. I stay on cause I get a kick out of making people laugh, plus I do talk to a few that are nice, but only for a short while and thier gone, but does not bother me, cause if I had to rely on pof to find a date I might as well hang it up now. Thank you for letting me voice my opinion,
Well, I think the site should be named plenty of dogs.There are so many married men.All of the married men are looking for sexual confrontations.They should be another site named “PlenTy of Sex 4 u”.At least this way it may drive all of the dogs to that site.Besides most women want sex also, but we want more of a relationship.So make a site for all those men…so they can just throw the woman a $20 , he can slide down to the street corner, pick it up. He can continue to use the same format: NSA, PREFER NOT TO SAY,ADD TO THE FAVORITES etc……
I think this site has a lot to offer. BUT ! you all need to understand, IT’S FREE, So, you are going to get a BIG HANDFULL of people who are just here to mess with those of us who are FOR Real.
These people have nothing better to do. They will crude, rude, and obnoxious. This is the reason other sties make you PAY! I see in the near future , and I’m NOT clairvoyant. POF will start making us pay, just to weed out the AS%@#H*&ES. thanx. CHEECH
LMAO - seems like everyone who is anyone that has gone to POF all have the same results as myself - a waste of time! I cannot believe the number of liars (both women and men) that are on the site who lie about their age, looks, status (single or married)- about 90% of the women I have met had boyfriends already - sooooooooooo I am gonna go back over to myspace (I have alredy met a few women that do seem to be interested - even two of them left the POF site to be on myspace!) Remember folks - you can be anyone you want to be out here in cyberspace!
Now for all the other women out there that have run into nothing but jerks:
1. I am definately single!
2. I am 100% honest on every site that I am on
3. I update my photos at least once every 3 months
4. I do not run away from any dates that I have setup
5. I have not messaged anyone for sex (either in person or by phone LMAO!)
6. I have a full time job and love my music in my offtimes
There you have it! One honest person here that is not scared to admit it!
i have to agree that pof even though it is free leaves a lot to be desired. i did not have a problem with the members. it was the admins and their biased treatment of images. they seem to be homophobes or something over there and are very restrictive on the gay/bi male members while allowing the girls to get away with murder.
even though it is free, just not worth the hassle.
I too have had bad times at pof. I’ve been kicked off there several times. The guy who runs the place was on a news show about how he helped track down a criminal using the site.
anyways … like I said, I’ve been booted off the site several times. Some get way with a lot, some don’t get away with anything, or even by doing nothing. Not supposed to do this, not supposed to do that, yet others do the same thing and flurish. I dared question the practices there, and I’m on the outside looking in. Long story, but the guy who runs it seems like he’s very biased, controlling, immature and predjudice.
I have to agree with what the majority here are saying. So far, in three months, I’ve met 3 people. One turned out to be very odd (I should have paid more attention to the red flags–he had more than the Kremlin!). The next two were alcoholics in denial (one had 8 drinks during our 2.5 hour date–and thought nothing of it).
I don’t see as many completely illiterate people there as on other sites. My thought: the best strategy is to go on the pay sites, but only stay on for a month–then change sites. Or change your photo fairly regularly.
No two ways about it: internet dating is NOT for the faint of heart.
I joined POF in late 2005. I conversed with a number of women and met one who turned out to be a complete flake. Not only did she have to drink to meet me but she showed up around 9pm when we were to meet a 3pm. then she told me how she goes to the casinos in upstste NY and about buying Valium from Canada via the internet. She was to call me again and never did because she decided to go out instead. So I waited at home most of the night while she was out gambling.chatted with a few others that vanished. They just left the site with no goodbyes. Met ones who were looking for talk/emails and thought: This is a DATING site if you want to just chat join a chat room. Met a few nice women, met some with horror stories both on and off the net and loads of baggage. Only met one decent woman on there. POF, you get what you pay for that’s for sure. Also, I’m no prince but none of my matches looked anywhere near what I had required.
livingthedream on POF was quite a scary date and I left a testemonial to warn others but it was never put on his profile.
He bite me several times quite hard and yanked my hair all in a public Jazz club. What might have he done if we were alone? If a person is a sadist they should state it not say they are gentle as he did. He was far from gentle
I met several guys from POF. 2 really nice ones. 1 that I am still friends with. Its sad, but the others. All just want a booty call. It should be called ” plenty of booty”.
They say they want LTR but its all about them, or sex, then they think they can call of come over any time they want, and all on their terms. then make excuses like… Im looking for more.. or something better, or you are too emotional, or some load of shit! well guys, guess what.. women ARE emotional.. get over that! its how we are wired! Dont use cliches like _ “its not you- its me” bullsh*! Dont say you are something when you are not. yes, people, I have used POF for about 5 months, and nothing has brought me happiness. Guess I will have to pay for quality.. thats a sad fact!
I’ve been a member of POF for several months. The site’s major problem seems to be the egotistical forum moderators who pick and choose who to ban from posting, ranging from a few days to a permanent ban. Any email to them that is returned is laced with superiority and “I’m a God” type language.
Rules are not enforced equally in the profiles either. People reported for not having a picture of themselves may or may not be deleted, depending on the whim of the owner and his moderators.
There’s a member named darkeyedjoker who is a fake, quite probably placed as eye candy bait. He’s been reported numerous times by numerous users and remains a member. He presents an attractive picture and profile, and his city changes by the hour or day…sometimes several times in one day.
Users who attempt to get in under the filters (a very nice option in my opinion) by saying they are looking for long term, but stating in their profile description that they are looking for a piece of ass, are not deleted, even though they are violating the rules of the site.
Many of the girls and guys are just there to be voted a 10 and end up on the top 500 beautiful people list. The owner could care less. A young girl in a thong gets his site lots of hits afterall. This is going to end up nothing but a porn addict site. Too bad.
I too have been a member three different times in 18 months. Finally this last time i have decided that alot of these men are full of hot air and probably don’t know what they want, and i agree with one of these other blogs, in the respect of photos having to be used and can only be head shots. I think there is too much emphasis on looks myself.
I agree, plentyoffish can be an awful place to meet decent people. I met and dated a guy i met on pof, i was swept off my feet just to be dropped on my keester. But only after he convinced me he was deeply in love with me, and my kids. The guy said so many things, planning out our future together. Marriage, future children, the whole 9 yards, and then basically dumps me. Turns out he was still looking for women the whole time, among other Dirty rotten underhanded things behind my back. Wanting a long-term relationship, my big fat fanny.
And there are plenty of others like him out there. They use you up if they can. I am sure i wasn’t the first one he did this too and i won’t be the last. I hate it! How a lot of the men on there lie about what they are looking for. And prey on so many of us women who just want to find that special someone. I am certain there are women of this variety too, but i have never had so many players approach me on other sites as i have had on plentyoffish. Thats not to say i haven’t met some wonderful people and friends there too. I have. But i have been more disgusted with this site than any other.
Presently i have been talking with a so far very nice and promising guy on here, but at anytime i suppose my view could change. It seems like a lot of the men on there have polished their performances to a high gloss, and it seems it becomes close to impossible to weed out the good from the bad. It’s scary, and way too much drama for me to deal with. If this honey of a guy I am hopeful of, turns out to be a poisonous snake, i may lose all faith in finding that certain someone, and completely abandon plentyoffish all together.
I am beginning to think they should change plentyoffish’s site name to the viperpit.com,And the logo to a place where you are used, abused and confused. It’s a sad thing when you are the one fishing and you become the eaten bait, and so wrong. Plentyof fish need a place on your profile where you can email, the people in charge of your conserns, without having them posted for the public, where all users can give their concerns and have their problems addressed by a real person from the group of site managers. And actually have them do something about these people, because so far any concerns I have had and have sent them have gone unanswered and unaddressed. It’s dispicable and I am fed up with all of it!
I wouldn’t recomend plentyoffish to anyone who really wants to find someone who won’t spear you through the heart. It’s just awful.
Yes, and the being banned from the forums thing is a joke too. I agree with kd on this. Some have been banned for just being truthful, and not being mean at all, while there are some nasty people who do nothing but bash posters constantly and nothing ever happens to them. I have first hand knowledge of this. And it’s crazy how they can judge to bann you for as much as 3 years for not much of anything, even first time, and unintentioned small offenses, with no warning at all. It’s a harsh and cruel joke. Plentyoffish has really disappointed me. And i feel the creators should really take a hard look at what they are allowing their site to become. It’s a meat market. And some of the moderators of the forums should have to give warnings or something. And allowing things to go on like they do while stiff-arming others is crazy. There just is no clear outline or rules they seem to follow. The same punishments are not given to everyone, and they don’t seem to care. And This is just chaos and madness to me.
POF was a member there 14 times never had any luck, wish i could get some flesh, no one paid attention to me there,dave
OMG so true about Plenty of Fish.com dating website - the people do not seem to want serious relationships - though their profile heading states WIDOWED & LOOKING FOR ONLY ONE! ugh
I think both statements are down right lies! Trust me just been burnt to a crisp. How do people waste 4 hours per nite, multiple hours daytime, all weekend long chats for months, poems and deep emotional output and heartfelt information later, only to one day spur of the moment - oh say 4am Monday morning - receive a post that says …”and this is where the Cowboy rides away”…OMG what the heck kinda of crap is out there?!… Not sure what these folks are on and what they’re getting off on but jollies are not funny.
Good thing I’ve never shot a gun!!!!!!!!!
Better hope never meet up with as may be drop kicked till they can no longer have proper vision - for life. Gee - only slightly burned - what d’ya think?????!!!!!!!!!!………..
Sorry - just a tangant.
But, yes I agree with moving on to a proper website, preferrably one with sponsors as it may be more reputable as well as the people on it.